Video Story
Trying out a new method of parenting
Story By: Bea Karnes
Source: NBC
"Have a New Kid by Friday-- How to Change your Child's Attitude, Behavior and Character in Five Days," is the title of psychologist Kevin Leman's book.
Gail Rodman read it, shared what she learned with her husband Robert, and then proceeded to try it out with 9-year-old Alex, 7-year-old Samantha and 4-year-old Reed.
It didn't take long for the Rodmans to learn that having a new kid by Friday actually meant being a new parent by Friday, too. "I'm trying really hard now to respond to behavior rather than react to behavior," Rodman said.
For example, Rodman said she stopped trying to referee fights between siblings. "When the kids are fighting, I usually turn and get myself involved with the fight," she said. That only guaranteed more fights later, with her having to come to the rescue. But now, she simply tells them to work it out. For the most part, they do.
She said she believes the key is to make sure that kids who have misbehaved understand that there will be consequences. Bad behavior isn't forgotten; she keeps it in mind. "When they come to ask me for something, or they want something from me, I will then say to them, 'You know I didn't like your behavior earlier,'" Rodman said. At which point, Rodman firmly denies them their request. "I think sometimes having consequences is the best teacher, " she added.
For Robert Rodman, the five-day experiment forced him to break the habit of checking his oldest daughter's homework. "Usually, after she's just about ready to go to sleep," he said he'd "kind of peruse over the homework and just say 'Oh, I think you want to check this again.' On day two, Gail stopped me right in my tracks and said you can't do that. You've got to let her bear the consequences of making mistakes."


